Welcome back, fellow growth seeker and change-maker!

I am writing this newsletter in Northern Macedonia, where I just finished teaching my ten-day Vital Planning Life and Business Mastery client-focused coaching and training program and helping my clients dissolve many mental and emotional blockages and solve business and employee issues that were causing them headaches, sleepless nights, and lead to him feeling stressed and burnout. I also coached an army general, a private hospital owner, a celebrity singer, and aspiring entrepreneurs.

Furthermore, I was interviewed on five T.V. stations in Northern Macedonia and Kosova on various business, leadership, human behaviour, personal success, and relationship-related topics. It also included stories and experiences of the recent Quilly® Award I received in Hollywood for The Unfakeable Code® book, Book Excellence and the Maincrest Media Book Award for A Path to Excellence book and the Hollywood Premier of The Truth About Reading documentary that tackles the growing illiteracy crisis in the USA.

This week’s newsletter was inspired by the growth, success, and breakthroughs I helped my clients achieve and the gratitude comments I received from everyone I met and interviewed. It is about The Octagon of Excellence® Method I describe in more detail in A Path to Excellence book, and how it can help you through tricky times and when you feel powerless, stuck, stressed and uninspired.

Before I share more, I trust my previous newsletter topic, So Busy That You Have No Time for Love, was valuable for you and your family, relationship, entrepreneurial, career, business, and financial growth and saying yes to love. For those looking for a more empowered and meaningful relationship, check out this article published by ISSUU magazine and learn why love is the destroyer and creator of life.

Let’s get your creative juices flowing by answering the following questions first:

Are you ready to break free from your current limits and get unstuck? Do you want to be more productive, create change in your life and reach the goals you have worked on for a long time faster? Would focusing your mental faculties on the things that help you achieve personal excellence benefit you?

If so, then this week’s newsletter is the guide for you!

One topic that has interested me since I was very young is what makes some live an average life and others willingly strive for personal excellence. My fascination with top mathematicians, physicians, and inventors such as Nikola Tesla, Albert Einstein, and Thomas Edison inspired me to study their lives more thoroughly. I learned that they all showed attributes of personal excellence and what it takes to leave a legacy that stands the test of time.

Having coached and mentored businesses from all market sectors and individuals from all professional backgrounds, I realised they faced similar issues. What was happening in their heads was the root of all their challenges. After I wrote and published The Unfakeable Code® in 2021, I felt inspired to write and recently publish A Path to Excellence book.

The reason is I wanted to share the process I used to help myself and all of my clients achieve personal, relationship, professional, financial and busienss breakthroughs and attain unshakeable confidence in The Octagon Method® with a mission to help others create phenomenal growth, fulfilment, and success. It is a step-by-step system that shows you how to transform your life by transforming perceived blocks into life breakthroughs and creating new opportunities.

It’s based on the teachings that took me over thirty years to acquire, teach, and master. As someone who has delivered over 25,000 coaching and training hours and helped thousands of people do just that, I know those who learn the eight principles shared and apply them daily will increase their chances of success in any of the critical areas of life they want to empower.

What is The Octagon of Excellence®?

It is a set of principles, a tool that helps you to get unstuck and move forward. It’s an eight-step process that can help you get unstuck and move forward. The Octagon of Excellence is a way to transform your life. You can read more about the book and the eight steps HERE!

A Path to Excellence Tony J. Selimi Leadership and Growth-Focused Development Book

Each step will help you clarify what you truly want in life; it will show you how to break down each item on the list you will be creating as you answer the questions into its most essential parts, then show you how to ask yourself what you need to do or change to achieve each item on your list. The key is focusing on one part at a time until it’s done right before moving on to the next.

The Octagon of Excellence® is a revolutionary approach to getting unstuck and achieving excellence as you move from one life cycle into the other. For instance, the end of a job, career, or relationship and the start of a new one. Throughout life, you will experience identity crises and lose a loved one. Sometimes you need to close one chapter of your life and start a new one. This robust framework can help you move forward and achieve whatever you desire as you go through various life cycles.

The first step to this method is understanding what each side of the octagon represents and looks like in your life. An octagon has eight cycles, transition, regeneration, focus, rebirth, balance, service, unity, and infinity, just like how you have eight areas of your life that are wise to focus on empowering simultaneously as you go through the various life cycles: Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, Physical, Relationship, Social, Career/Business and Finances. When these eight sides and eight processes are managed effectively and mindfully, there’s no limit to what you can accomplish!

To help you get unstuck, it’s time to get what blocks you out of your head and here are four questions that can help you do this:

1. What is the worst thing that could happen?
2. What am I terrified of?
3. What is the best possible outcome?
4. How can I turn this into an opportunity?

Do write down your answers before you continue reading. What came up for you? Have you noticed how many people often respond to the question “Why?” with “That’s the way it is. Because that’s what I chose, it’s not personal; it is what it is.”

But when you have a problem and you don’t know why, or any other thing or situation in life where there isn’t an obvious answer right away (or even at all), you can use this technique to help yourself find your reasons for things and situations in life by asking yourself questions such as:

Why did I do that? What was my reason? How did I feel at the time? How do I feel now? What else could I have done instead?

You are reading this article because you want personal excellence deep down. To help you don’t his journey, here are three truths worth remembering:

1. The first truth is that we are all worthy of excellence. That means you, me, the athlete across from you at practice, that guy who’s been struggling in class… Everyone has the potential to achieve excellence. We can do it with hard work and persistence, but most importantly, with being smart and believing in ourselves and our abilities.
2. The second truth is that we are all capable of excellence. You may think, “Well yeah, but I’m not a natural athlete, singer, scientist, engineer, entrepreneur, CEO, etc.” Or maybe your schoolwork isn’t coming easy for some reason—you’re getting B’s instead of As or A pluses like everyone else seems to be getting. That doesn’t mean anything! Anyone can become excellent at anything if they want to and put forth the effort required for success (the same way anyone can get better at any skill if they practice enough). I never imagined going from homeless to being honoured and celebrated in Hollywood for my work that took over thirty years to bring forward.
3. The third truth is that we all have the potential to achieve excellence through hard work and persistence. The key here is being persistent—no matter how often something doesn’t seem right or feels uncomfortable (like failing a couple of tests, failing in busienss, a relationship, creating a fashion brand, etc.), keep working on it until finally, one day,y everything clicks into place!

As I was coaching my client in Northern Macedonia, I wrote this quote I created a while back on one of the white stackable whiteboard sheets I use when I coach clients:

“Don’t give up on yourself; give up the gremlins in your head.” Tony J. Selimi ( do share it)

If you’re going to get anywhere in life, you need to believe in yourself. Don’t give up on your goals. Your goal isn’t the only thing keeping you going—your goals keep you going! Don’t give up on your dreams. You’ve got this! Nothing stops you from reaching them but yourself; if there were, we’d be too busy being happy with our lives to stop and think about it.

Don’t give up on your family (unless they’re gremlins, some of my family members are, and I learned to appreciate and love them from a distance). It can be tempting when things get tough or when everyone seems so much happier without us around—but trust me: no one is ever pleased without their family around to annoy them occasionally for their good.

Don’t give up on your friends (unless they’re gremlins). Take it from someone who knows: sometimes the most challenging part of an argument is remembering that neither side has a monopoly over truth; both sides have valid points that deserve respect and consideration before coming to any conclusion about which side deserves more empathy than another.*

Don’t give up on your health (unless you are already dead, in which case you aren’t reading this). Sometimes, something gets in the way of our exercise routines or eating habits; humans are imperfect creatures, prone as we are by nature toward laziness and gluttony!

But that doesn’t mean we should throw in the towel entirely; rather than giving into temptation every time something comes along that makes us feel guilty or distracted from our goals…why not try asking ourselves, “Is there anything I can do right now?” instead?

Chances are good that there is at least one small thing within our reach right now (like walking downstairs instead of taking the elevator) which would make all those oversized things seem less daunting tomorrow morning when everyone else is off doing their best while we’re stuck lying awake again thinking about how hard.

Another quote I shared and used to help my client grow is this:

“To achieve personal excellence is to master self-discipline and commit to achieving values-driven goals and a vision beyond oneself.” – Tony J. Selimi

Let’s go ahead and get right to it.

Self-discipline is a skill that can be learned, but it takes time and effort. You can start small by focusing on one thing at a time until you’ve mastered that skill. Then move on to the next task or project aligned with your values and goals. The key is to keep going; don’t give up when you feel like quitting or getting sidetracked. Investing in coaching and mentoring can significantly increase your self-discipline.

You can use tools and apps to help you stay motivated and self-disciplined when working toward your big dreams (like I did use The Octagon of Excellence® Method), but ultimately, improving your self-discipline comes down to doing more of what you already do well!

Here are Eight Simple Steps To Transform Your Life

Now that you’ve familiarised yourself with the Octagon of Excellence Method, it’s time to put it into practice. Here are eight simple steps to get you started:

1. Take daily inspired action.
2. Appreciate the negative and the positive, and focus on the positive.
3. Be grateful for what you have now. (And who you are now)
4. Forgive yourself and others as needed.
5. Invest in coaching and work with a qualified coach and experienced mentor that equally challenges and supports you.
6. Be patient with yourself and others when they make mistakes or fail to get back on track.
7. Be kind to yourself and others in your life.
8. Have fun!

By following the above eight steps, you can get unstuck, heal your life and reach your goals without feeling like you’re doing anything special! Use The Octagon of Excellence® Method to help you navigate the eight inevitable cycles of life transition, regeneration, focus, rebirth, balance, service, unity and infinity.

This method is based on what I have learned from ancient wisdom, the world’s best teachers, thirty years of working experience and the latest scientific discoveries, which provides you with a proven map for navigating through the ups and downs of life.

It offers practical tools to understand what is happening at any time in whatever life cycle you find yourself in and how to deal with it to create more freedom and order from stressful situations. By following this method step by step, as outlined in A Path to Excellence book – which essentially involves paying attention to what is happening inside and around you – you can obtain clarity about your own lives as well as other people’s lives too and what you can do to grow into your fullest potential.

To conclude,

When you read the word “excellence,” do you immediately think of something lofty and unattainable?

I know I used to. But as it turns out, excellence is pretty simple. The Octagon of Excellence® Method will show you how to reach your potential in all areas of your life by following just eight simple principles:

1. To break free from ambiguity, clarify what you want, why you want it, and when you want it, this will help you identify what’s necessary;
2. Awakening your astronomical vision requires committing to something bigger than yourself. This will help you focus on those things that will get you there;
3. To build resilience, it is wise to immediately confront any issues and respond mindfully and objectively. This will help you get unstuck from negative thoughts;
4. Making mistakes is human, correcting them awakens your excellence. Asking yourself quality questions when faced with mistakes and obstacles is a wise thing to do;
5. For better, more efficient and more effective results seek expert advice, coaching is a great way to help you remember that whatever happened yesterday is today’s lesson for tomorrow;
6. To grow on the inside and expand on the outside, collaborate. This will assist you practice self-discipline through daily connecting with others in more meaningful ways;
7. To unleash the power of gratitude, graciously give and accept compliments. Appreciating others promotes trust and learning from other people’s experiences by listening closely and empathempathisingothers’ feelings.
8. 8) Continuously celebrating small wins can change your physiology, strengthen your psychology, and maximise your potential.

I trust you got much inspiration and value from this week’s article on the importance of striving for personal excellence. For those of you who want to create unique relationships, careers, business, leadership, team and financial breakthroughs, as your coaching partner, my focus is to work together on finding out exactly the root cause of your blocks and effectively and efficiently find solutions to your frustrations, problems and create the mindset and the plan on accelerating your journey to self-mastery, living in abundance, develop personal and leadership excellence, grow your influence, success, fulfilment and inspiration.

Love and Wisdom

Tony J. Selimi – Award-Winning Author, Speaker, and Transformational Life and Business Coach SpeciaSpecialisingman Behaviour, Leadership Excellence, and Maximising Human Potential. Winner of the London SME Most Visionary Entrepreneur, Corporate Coaching and Recruitment Business Coach of the Year Award, Silver Winner of Literary Book Award, and Maincreast Media Book, New York City Big Book, Book Excellence, and the Quilly® Award for A Path to Wisdom, Loneliness, The Unfakeable Code®, and A Path to Excellence.

(Follow for more: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or YouTube.)

P.S. I work virtually and in person with clients all over the globe, facilitating the realisation and accomplishment of personal, relational, professional, financial and business goals. Here are four ways I can assist you in creating life-changing breakthroughs, growth, and accelerating your journey to excellent health, influence, wealth, transformational leadership, and going from where you are to where you genuinely want to be in every critical area of life.

#1… Book a Breakthrough Consultation Session by sending an e-mail to info@tonyselimi.com. I invite entrepreneurs, influencers, growth seekers, high achievers and change-makers to spend five or ten incredible growth-focused days transforming what pains you into what inspires you by being privately coached and trained by me—taking place in beautiful locations worldwide. Booking yourself on Vital Planning Business and Life Mastery Training will assist you in learning new and more productive ways and proven methods, tools, and principles that can help you upgrade your psychology and achieve your wildest dreams. We will work together on expanding your vision and delivering the ever-evolving purpose you want to share with the world.

#2 … Grab your copy of my #1 Amazon bestselling and Multi-Award-Winning books, A Path to Wisdom, #Loneliness, The Unfakeable Code®, A Path to Excellence and enrol in my Mindfulness for Higher Productivity, Performance, and Profitable Life Udemy Course! Click here to join thousands of happy students.

#3 … Make the fastest progress by hiring me to work with you on your business to train and grow your teams.

#4 … Hire me as a speaker to educate, inspire and transform your audience at your next company or industry event.

Dear growth seeker,

Thank you for choosing to invest your time in reading this article about the importance of transformative leadership and growing the most precious asset you will ever possess – You.

So many of you have messaged me here on my website, LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook and on WhatsUp to ask me to share some insights on the recent most spoken two topics that affect every human being – Will Smith’s violent response after the comedian Chris Rock made a joke about his wife Jada Pinkett Smith which not only shocked the live audience at the Oscars but also sparked media attention around the world and the invasion of Ukraine. So I decided to write this article and share my thoughts in a way that can start the so needed leadership conversations not only in every business and organisation but also in governments around the world.

Both incidents mentioned above are great examples of the destructive power of our inability to control ourselves when emotions, biases, and judgment get the best of us. Perhaps it is time to shape the narratives around the kind of distraction we as human beings and what Authoritarian and Transactional Leadership are capable of. But it is also a great example of how the same distraction can create a rippling effect of uniting leaders to step up and focus on the safety, growth and protection of their people and the very same foundation upon which democracy is built.

The Ukrainian leader Volodymyr Oleksandrovych Zelensky, a former actor and comedian who became the sixth and incumbent president of Ukraine, is an excellent example of the traits of Transformational Leadership. He rose to the challenges he as an individual faced when the war in Ukraine started, but he also managed to mobilise his people to fight one of the strongest armies in the world and managed to galvanise the EU and NATO leaders to step up their game.

The truth is…

Transformational leaders are focused on the safety, wellbeing, growth and development of their people. They set clear expectations, honour commitments, and keep their employees accountable to goals. Transformational leadership has been shown to result in higher morale, decreased turnover, greater motivation (both for the leader and for team members), more innovation and creativity, increased productivity, better communication between employees and management, improved performance in high-stress situations (such as emergencies), increased trust among employees and higher earnings for the company as a whole.

As an employee or a manager, you’re already great at hitting your deadlines, completing projects on time and under budget, and maintaining positive relationships with your direct reports. But when there’s a big, hairy project that needs to be completed—like launching a new product or implementing an organisational change—that’s where you fall short. You feel like you’re spinning your wheels trying to rally the troops. You don’t know what steps to take to get out of this rut and gain traction.

One of the main benefits to use coaching, training, and development as an empowering tool to activate leadership in everyone in your organisation is this:

Transformational Leaders Are Excellent at Asking Quality Questions and at Listening.

They ask questions to understand how people feel about a situation. They ask questions to help people get to the root of a complex problem. They ask questions to help people find solutions. They ask questions that help people move forward in life, whether it is by identifying their blind spots or providing direction and inspiration for a new way forward.

What better way to transform your people than by asking questions that will help them think outside the box, consider new perspectives and improve their performance, decision-making and communication?

For instance, in The Unfakeable Code®, I share more about what questions could you ask your people to help them rethink their approach to a provocation or a project? What questions could you ask them to encourage them to take off the mask and be open to exploring new ideas or looking at things differently? What questions could you ask that would help them make more effective decisions? Or communicate more effectively with customers or colleagues?

Another reason to promote authentic leadership in your organisation is this:

Transformational Leaders Are Excellent at Empowering Others.

Empowerment is a simple concept to understand. It means giving people the freedom to make decisions and act on them. Empowerment is essential in an organisation since the manager won’t always be there to guide others, so they need to be empowered to make their own decisions.

Over the years, I have had the pleasure to coach and mentor businesses from all market sectors and leaders of some of the fortune 500 companies to create a culture where empowerment thrives by building trust within the board,  teams, and every employee in the organisation. As we worked together on achieving their objectives, every client has realised how trust and empowerment go hand in hand; if you don’t trust someone, you’re unlikely to empower them with decision-making authority.

In our professional careers, we all come across transactional leaders and managers. They are perceived as inauthentic, dull, and unworthy of our trust because of how they act, behave, and treat the people they manage. Such leaders don’t get many opportunities to practice being exciting and original, so they stay disempowered.

With enough encouragement, coaching, and training, anyone can be anything. So why not invest in activating leadership across your entire organisation?

Transformational Leaders Inspire Vision and Purpose.

You may have heard the old saying, “dance like no one is watching.” Maybe you’ve said it yourself. Dancing like no one is watching has become a cliché for letting go, but what if it were more than just a feel-good adage?

What if dancing like no one was watching was the first step toward achieving something you want – dancing on Broadway, winning an Olympic medal, or just shedding a few pounds and feeling better about yourself?

Most people are afraid to take that first step because they’re worried about what other people will think. But we believe there’s a real opportunity to achieve your goals if you ignore everyone else and focus on what you want.

Transformational Leaders Encourage Innovation.

Good leaders are open-minded, and this openness is a crucial part of what makes them suitable. They’re willing to consider new ideas and ways, encouraging others to do the same. This makes it easier for their employees to think creatively, which can help the team address challenges or identify new opportunities.

Transformational Leaders Set Challenging Goals.

Transformational leaders set challenging goals and can mobilise people to achieve them. Volodymyr Zelensky, NATO and the EU are great examples of this. They also create a sense of urgency, setting deadlines and milestones to keep things on track. Finally, they empower followers by giving them the freedom to achieve the end in their way.

This doesn’t mean that you can say: “I have a great idea! We should build an Android Artificial Intelligence Powered phone!” Then hand the team a blank canvas, walk away and expect results. Setting challenging goals is essential but not enough; these leaders also ensure that followers understand their role in achieving the outcome and providing the necessary resources. Both NATO and the EU are giving Ukraine many resources to help them fight back Russia Invasion. And finally, they make sure team members have sufficient time for reflection to plan their next steps appropriately (rather than jumping from crisis to crisis).

Transformational Leadership Assist in Creating Effective, Efficient and Energised Managers and Employees.

In one of the companies, I was hired to assist them in addressing low productivity, poor performance, and high turnover staff issues. I observed how many did not like working for the company because they felt not listened to, not necessary, and did not want to face colleagues used to moaning, criticising, and bringing other people down. Their leaders were not listening to what everyone in the company felt, which many found to be demoralising and destructive.

What I did as their coaching partner was to clarify the behaviours that fuel transactional leadership and management and use it to:

• Motivate and inspire staff to achieve their full potential
• Build loyalty and trust
• Create a positive and supportive environment
• Encourage teamwork, innovation and collaboration
• Set challenging and values-driven goals
• Improve employee’s mental health, performance and wellbeing
• Grow their reputation, productivity and profits

I love travelling the world and assisting others in creating transformational results. One thing that inspired me throughout my life to keep learning, growing, and sharing my gifts for the benefit of others is what my father, a successful restaurateur told me as I was growing up:

“My son, if you want your business to grow, then assist others to grow by leading by example.”

You’ve just read about the transformative leadership possible for you and your organisation. Now it’s time to take the next step and get started on your path to being a transformative leader and activating leadership across your entire business.

Get in touch with me today! As your coaching partner, it will be an honour to work on addressing the issues that cause you headaches, pain, and frustrations and get you the clarity, the tools, and the plan that begins to grow you and your employees into the best transformational leader possible. You’ll learn practical ways and skills that will help you to inspire your employees and elevate them above their peers at competing companies while also inspiring yourself as a leader.

There’s no reason your organisation can’t become the market leader, and I love sharing how to get the results and where you want to be by becoming a transformative leader.

Love and Wisdom

Tony J. Selimi – Award-Winning Author, Speaker, and Transformational Live and Business Coach Specialising in Human Behaviour, Leadership Excellence, and Maximising Human Potential. Winner of the London SME Most Visionary Entrepreneur 2020 award, Corporate Coaching and Recruitment Business Coach of the Year 2021 Award, Silver Winner of Literary Book Award 2021, and Maincreast Media Book Award 2021 for A Path to Wisdom, #Loneliness, and The Unfakeable Code®.

PS – I work on a virtual basis and in-person with clients all over the globe, facilitating the realisation and accomplishment of personal, professional, and business goals. Here are four ways I can assist you in creating life-changing breakthroughs, growth, and accelerating your journey to excellent health, influence, transformational leadership and success.

#1… Book a Breakthrough Consultation Session by sending an email to info@tonyselimi.com

#2 … Grab your copy of my #1 Amazon bestselling and Multi-Award-Winning books, A Path to Wisdom, #Loneliness, The Unfakeable Code®, and enrol in my Mindfulness for Higher Productivity, Performance, and Profitable Life Udemy Course! Click here to join thousands of my happy students.

#3 … Make the fastest progress by hiring me to work with you on your business and train your teams. Just reply to this message and put “private” in the subject line. Let me know a little about you or your business and what you’d like to work on together, and I’ll get you the quote, invoice, and the necessary booking details.

#4 … Hire me as a speaker to educate, inspire and transform your audience at your next company or industry event. Click HERE to download my speaker sheet and fill in the form with your event info, and once I hear from you, I’ll send you the contract and fee info back.

In my recent TV interview with Zërijeta Jajaga for her show @Open I was asked:

Why would people not want to invest in the greatest asset -you? What is it that holds people back to have a coach or a mentor? What can coaches do for you?

There are many reasons why people may not use a coach. Some to mention are having lack of financial resources, not having personal development high on their highest values, time rstrictions, and in many cases simply not knowing what a great life coach can do for them.

I went on to explain to her audience that a Life Coach is someone who through powerful questioning is ale to be the mirror the client needs to reflect back at themselves the clarity, certainty, and credibility needed to make better life choices, decisions, and create the healthy habits designed to create their dream life.

Throughout centuries the greatest rulers of all times used trusted advisers to help them direct their kingdom and win wars. In the recent real life coaching Hollywood and Los Angeles Award Winning documentary “Living My Illusion,” that I co-created with my elite coaching clients Joel and Timea Van der Molen, it highlights how having a coach it is not a new age thing. In contrary, it is the advisory services of the great philosopher Aristotle that helped the world-conqueror Alexander the Great win battles and conquer new lands.